Dreams can be cool, so very cool!

Last night I dreamt that I was a Ghostbuster!

So apparently I'm going to Australia...

I'm not quite sure how it happened really.
My good friend Gordon has gone to Oz to live for a few years and invited me out to visit him, good excuse so (with about a years notice) I arranged a month or two unpaid off work, so the plan was to go over for September/October time. Well it's no secret that I wasn't enjoy work as much as would like, to cut a long story short it doesn't have enough of a creative element involved for me, and I was looking around for something new hopefully in creative visualisation or graphic design of somekind. So when I was told that dispite the previous arangement I would not be allowed the time off to go to Australia it was the catalyst I needed to get me moving. A few people were key in my final decision:

• Jaime - Jaime had the misfortune of sitting next to me at work and hence got the brunt of my general bad mood, but she's always been a supportive friend (as well as an equally under used resource at Spotlight!) and keen traveller so was quick to suggest I went to Oz whatever work said.
• Gordon - obviously Gord was nice enough to invite me out in the first place, but also when I said I couldn't make it he just said that I was always welcome and when I decided to tell them where to stick their job and go to Oz anyway I could stay with him until I got myself on my feet!
• Stephen - after being told I couldn't have the time off for Oz Stephen and I took a road to the south of France, it was perfectly chilled out enough that I could get my thoughts together (with some wise words from Stephen) and make my decisions. Also as my flatmate he's had to put up with my work related rants for sometime now!
• Cez - my brother has always listened to my problems and occationally offered solutions. He's a proponent of the take a big leap and do something crazy school of thought - and although both of us are usually too scared to take those risks this year we both have, he has quit his job and is going become a teacher (good luck bro!)
• Danny Wallace - I was read Danny Wallace's excellent book "Yes Man" for the second time when all this kicked off. The main thrust of the book is about being positive and taking hold of the possibilities that life throws your way or even creating them yourself. And by coincidence one of the biggest decisions that Danny has to make is about Australia. I'll say no more for fear of ruining the book - which you really ought to read and maybe even learn from!
  

So yes I'm off to Australia, it's one of the craziest things I've ever done, I'm more than a little scared but above all I'm excited! Let's see how sunburnt this tiger can get!

Fear of failure is self-fulfilling!

My cowardice is almost as inhibiting as my lack of self confidence, good eh?
I'll never get into design because I don't believe I'm good enough combined with the fact that I'll never be brave enough to make the jump from the known to the unknown.
Risk is just something I'm no good at when I have a comfortable alternative.

I am NOT a vegetarian

The more the people label me the more I want to fight against it. I used to be a vegetarian for about 5 years - for about 5 years I ate no meat or fish, since then I have seldom cooked anything non-vegetarian probably because that's how I learnt to cook and if I can avoid killing animals then that's surely a good thing. Late last year I decided, in the hope of being a bit healthier, to return to a vegetarian diet. I was not vegetarian! If someone else was cooking I would eat what ever they provided. The plan was to do it for a month - but I was enjoying it so it has kept going... but I am not a vegetarian, I am someone who eats a mostly vegetarian diet. I like animals enough not to kill them, however there are times which for convenience or just selfish desire I will eat meat or at least that's the theory!
However I'm mental so now enough people think of me as vegetarian that I feel almost forced into being a vegetarian. It's ridiculous, why is it that other peoples thoughts and views affect me me so much? And why am I now feeling like rebelling? It's as though other peoples views bully me into a course of action which I then fight against, especially stupid because I was previously enjoying!
I over-think things and am a bit of an idiot but does anyone fancy a burger?

Wannabe Geek

I have realised recently that I occupy that uncomfortable middle-ground between geekdom and normality. Being, as I am, far too geeky to be anything but a social pariah and yet not geeky enough to actually be able to do anything useful like build a flux-capacitor or make a PC work!

Day 10, 2008

One of the resolutions I made was to take a photograph everyday this year. The hope being that I might improve my photography and photo editing skills, and it might also make an interesting review of the year.
Of course there is the problem of getting to the end of a non eventful day having seen nothing worth taking pictures of! So I may end up with a collection of photographs of objects in my house, and possibly having annoyed the hell out of my friends by constantly thrusting my camera in their faces!
We shall see! Here are the first 9, if you want to follow the progress you can find all my pictures here

Day One, 2008

Once again another year has passed and, as seems to be the tradition, I've made some resolutions. A fairly standard selection of changes intended to improve body mind and soul for the benefit of my fellow man and maybe, if my luck improves any time soon, some women too...

But then I began to wonder is the world worthy of such positivity and generosity? A pointless question I'll admit, that's simply not the way the world works, only doing things because you hope to be rewarded will lead only to frustration.

I'm still resolved, I shall better myself for my own benefit. I am prepare to continue bending myself to the will of the world but this year I also plan to bend the world to my will.

"It's the same thing your whole life: Clean up your room. Stand up straight. Pick up your feet. Take it like a man. Be nice to your sister. Don't mix beer and wine, ever. Don't drive on the railroad tracks... I'm not gonna live by their rules anymore! You make choices and live with them." - Phil Connors, Groundhog Day